Withering Flowers
by Okiedokie15
Summary: Tumblr prompt: Jungkook is dying and instead of calling for help, he calls Taehyung and carries on a normal conversation as if nothing was wrong, making sure to tell him how much he loves him before his time runs out.
1. I Love You

p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"emspan class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span knew his time was up./em/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"He was going to die span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"inevitably/span/span within the next few minutes; the state his body was in giving it all away. He had tried to fight against the gaping wound in his stomach which was eventually going to lead him to bleeding to death, controlling him, taking away his soul with each passing second - that was just how the human body worked. Full of life until it is harmed enough to send it spiraling into the hands of death, not being able to contain the soul that was once in there no longer. It was messed up, in a way, yet astonishing if you thought about it. How a single person's life could be ended forever just by one action, one movement of a hand on a knife or a twitch of a finger on a trigger. How nobody had knew what really happened when someone died, because nobody dead has been able to really come back and say where their soul had ventured off to, where it had been. Perhaps it was thrown into the dark cold abyss, that human's life now become degraded to nothing, as if they had never existed in the world. Their memories, experiences - gone forever. No longer existent, not even a trace of their soul left. Jungkook had thought about this a lot, yet he had never thought about it happening to him, ironic as that was. He never thought it would happen to him, as what would any human who was on the verge of dying. They didn't know it was going to happen to them. Not now, not at this second, at least. Yet Jungkook was here, bleeding so fast, so hard that he thought he could have filled a fish tank with blood if he wanted too. It couldn't stop. He was dying - quickly, rapidly; his breath getting less steady and his chest feeling more and more constricted with each one, pain shooting all over his body, close to giving up./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"It had taken him ten minutes to crawl to his phone which was now an arm's length away from him. He reached out slowly with a shaking arm, bringing it back to him as he turned over onto his back./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"If only he hadn't been so stupid, if only he'd payed attention to everything earlier today, everyone surrounding him. emIf only./em He thought if he'd only done emthis,/em or maybe only did emthat,/em he wouldn't have been in this horrible mess, laying down on the hard, cold cement, the rubble rubbing against his back and marking his arms, leaving scratches and drawing blood as he had moved across, his legs no longer functioning - all while bleeding to death, on the cold emcold/em ground. It wasn't exactly ideal, but it could have possibly been worse, even though it was far too late already; Jungkook had known if he called an ambulance right now, nothing could be done to save him, he was already gone, no hope left for him even though he had just would have wasted his last phone call in vain, in hopes of someone coming to save him, only to die not on top of the gravelly cement, but on top of a hospital bed, people surrounding him and crying their eyes out. He didn't want to burden anybody like that; yet it was miraculous that he could even move at this point, blood gushing out of his stomach like a hurricane, in this case one of the most deadliest ones./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"Rather than calling for an ambulance, span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span had dialed the number that span class="hiddenGrammarError"was engraved/span in his mind, the one he could never forget even if he had wanted to; the number of person he loved. emspan class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span./em He struggled with tapping it in, suddenly regretting not putting him on speed dial earlier. His vision was blurred, it suddenly becoming difficult to see, but he had eventually correctly imputed span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung's/span number and called him successfully./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"emOne ring./em/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"emTwo rings./em/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""Hello?" span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span weakly smiled upon hearing span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung's/span sweet voice over the line, the connection seeming smoother than it had ever been in his life, taking it all in at once. span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung's/span voice had always made butterflies swarm around in span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook's/span stomach no matter how much times he heard it, making his stomach do some sort of backflips every single time. It was beautiful in every single meaning of the word, comforting him in this dark time of his death that was soon to come, warming his heart as it had started to shut down, causing the same butterflies to become alive in his stomach even though it was hurting in that area, causing his body to overheat even though it was already plenty hot as it started to shut down, his breath being swept away by his voice even though it was literally being swept away by the death that was coming, trying to greet him. Unlike Taehyung's death's was a lot less sweet. Death had the same effect and toll on his body, yet for all of the wrong reasons. The painful reminder that he was dying and that he would never be able to hear how soft and sweet Taehyung's voice was ever again, how he might not be able to remember how beautiful he was, his memories being completely thrown into the abyss./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""Hey, span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span," span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span croaked out in reply, attempting to sound as normal as he possibly could in this moment. span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span must have sensed this, though, that something must have been wrong, emsomething wasn't right/em - he was quick to ask span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span if something was wrong and if he was okay, worridly. Taehyung was like that, worried about everything without having a good reason, yet Jungkook loved that about him, knowing that Taehyung had always cared deeply. Yet span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span being the stubborn one he span class="hiddenGrammarError"was told/span span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span that he was emfine/em and that span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span had nothing to worry about. emNothing at all/em. It was the exact opposite of that; span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span most obviously didn't buy into it, but he had decided to accept it anyway, unknowing that his life was about to change forever in the worst way possible./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"Taehyung drew in a sharp breath./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""Okay, just be careful."/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""Of?"/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""Everything, I don't know," was span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung's/span/span reply as he chuckled, the same smile that always had emitted sunrays planted on his face. "Make sure span class="hiddenGrammarError"to be/span aware of everything. I don't know how I'd be able to live without you." span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span was laughing on the other line, this being a joke that he had said regularly: emI don't know how I'd be able to live without you. /emTaehyung had always said this as a joke, never once thinking that Jungkook might really die one day, this being a mutual thing shared with the two boys. Now, it had broke span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook's /spanheart into a million pieces, damaged it even more as it was shutting down, if that was even possible - as if his heart was dying and it had just been strangled once again. It was getting harder and harder to breathe with each passing second, his breath suddenly becoming more restricted and shorter as the seconds went on, span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook's/span eyes becoming more droopy as well as he continued to push, just stay alive a while longer. emJust stay alive a while longer,/em Jungkook told Just a bit longer. Just to hear Taehyung's voice one last time. Just to speak to him one last time./em/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span."/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""Yes?"/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""I love you. emI love you so much./em"/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""I love you too. I think we've both established that already," span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span softly laughed, making span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook's/span heart drop and shudder upon hearing span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung's/span beautiful laugh once more. He thought Taehyung would be the death of him one day, ironically, but he wasn't./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""So," span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span started, "why did you call me?"/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""I just wanted to tell you how much I loved you," Jungkook replied, recalling his moments with Taehyung ad he shut his eyes and kept them closed before shooting them back open again, refusing to go into the wreck that was permanent sleep. "I just wanted to tell you how much you mean to me. Your beautiful voice, the way your eyes crinkle when you smile ever so perfectly. The way my heart feels so heavy span class="mceItemHidden"when/span you give me a look that's meant only for me. The way we can go and talk to each other about anything and everything and never get span class="hiddenGrammarError"bored of/span each other." span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook's/span system was well beyond starting to shut down, his words becoming more slurred and spaced as he continued talking; yet he didn't stop. He didn't want to stop. He wanted to tell Taehyung, emshow/em Taehyung how much he loved him in his last moments on this earth./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""I love the way your eyes light up when you see me. The way I light up when I see you. The way your nose span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"scrunches/span/span just a tad when you smile, your eyes span class="hiddenSpellError"emitting/span the brightest sun rays I have ever seen in my life, the way it steals my heart every time. The way I fall in love all over again whenever I see you, the way that you don't just rival the sun, but beat it at its own game. The way that you've filled my life with so much happiness, and that's all I could ever ask for, Taehyung."/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span...are you alright? You're worrying me."/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""Yes, I'm fine," span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span said sloppily and spaced, the words dragging out two seconds longer than it span class="hiddenGrammarError"should have been, sounding as if he was intoxicated or about to pass out; maybe even both./span. span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span on the other line was now worried at his weird and different speech pattern, fully ready to call span class="hiddenSpellError"Jimin/span or someone else to pick him up and drive to wherever span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span was just to see what was wrong with him./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""I don't believe span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"you-/span/span"/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""Trust me. Just - trust me, span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span. Please," span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span said quickly, his voice croaking at the very last word, not being able to continue saying proper sentences at this point with out wheezing, the air leaving him with each second. span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung /spanwanted to trust him, emoh how he wanted to trust him so much,/em to believe that span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span was alright and everything was emokay./em That he would be able to shower him with kisses and that everything wasem okay./em Yet, with all the convincing span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span gave to himself that span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span really was fine, span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span still couldn't believe it one bit, couldn't trust him at all, for some reason. span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook had/span no reason to lie to him, yet span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span couldn't even believe a span class="hiddenSuggestion"tiny bit/span of it, span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook's/span voice sounding so strained and tiny over the phone./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"And so, span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span lied./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""I trust you, okay? I trust you span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span." The line was quiet for about fifteen seconds, neither of them saying anything to break the silence that had now engulfed the both of them. span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook's/span body was now deteriorating, shutting down at a span class="hiddenSpellError"unexplainably/span quick rate - he had dubbed himself a minute or less to live, the sides of his vision now become blurry and dark, losing span class="hiddenSpellError"consciousness and slipping into the cold embrace of death./span/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span? Are you there? Are you really okay?"/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""I'm here," span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span croaked in reply, trying to take in deep breaths to continue on, only failing and coughing, wheezing, blood spilling out of his mouth as he did so, his body finally deciding to give up on him as he still tried to push on./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span?"/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""I have to go now," span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span said, truthfully. emThirty seconds./em "I love you span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span. Iloveyousomuch. Iloveyou."/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""I love you too," span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span replied, worried. emTwenty seconds./em/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""Just stay safe, alright? I miss you." emFifteen seconds./em/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""Yeah," was span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook's/span/span reply, his vision almost fully dark at this point, black spots dotting over the vision that he had left, his eyes hurting and straining. He could barely talk now, yet he wanted to spend these last moments with span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung, wanted his voice to be the last thing he heard/span./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span?"/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""Yes?"/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"em"Don't blame yourself, alright?"/em/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""For what?" span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span had tried to mutter out a half-decent reply to him, tell him not to worry about it, that life goes on and everything will be all right, but all that spilled out his mouth was blood./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"emHis time was up./em/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"He tried saying "I love you" to span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span one last time once he had noticed that he no longer had control over his body, emneeding/em to say it one last time before he could meet the cold embrace of death that was now coming to him fully. Yet, it was emtoo late/em. The darkness engulfed his body taking his mind and spirit with it, the breathing that was once shallow and short span class="hiddenGrammarError"completely gone to somewhere nobody knew of/span, his pulse along with it./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"emIt was too late./em/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span? span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span?" span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span was still on the other line, worried and confused about what had just happened, only a few seconds ago Jungkook had been talking to him, now silent and unresponsive. He finally hung up the call after five minutes of no reply, only to dial span class="hiddenSpellError"Jimin's/span number to see if he would be willing drive him to span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook's/span apartment and see what had just happened, if Jungkook was emokay./em span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span had hoped, prayed even, if there was a god out there, that span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span was alright, maybe - hopefully he span class="hiddenGrammarError"was just drunk/span or something. Maybe he had just fallen asleep while on the phone, which caused him not being able to respond. Maybe he was just a bit sick or something. span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung's mind had scrambled, coming to every possible solution so that/span he could convince himself that Jungkook was all right and that everything would be fine, that the worse things couldn't happen, not to Jungkook. Not to him. It was too soon and too fast, they both couldn't be victims of anything. Not yet. They were too young, too inexperienced. Jungkook still had plenty more years ahead of him, and so did Taehyung. emNothing bad could have happened to Jungkook,/em Taehyung had tried to convince himself./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"Yet he couldn't deny how his stomach had dropped when span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span had suddenly stopped replying to him, the feeling he had gotten at that exact moment as if the universe was trying to tell him something, the anxiety that was slowly creeping around the corner now visibly showing itself, attacking Taehyung at full force./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"emspan class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span had refused to acknowledge it, refused to think about his gut feeling, but he knew deep inside that he would never be able to talk to span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span again./em/p 


	2. Till Death Do us Part

p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" align="center"strongDeath./strong/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"It was such a harsh word. So short, yet so powerful, casting shadows over everyone at even span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenGrammarError"the brief mention of/span/span it. Sometimes, death doesn't mean anything to anyone; people all around them dying, gasping for whatever breath they can take, yet everyone else who isn't concerned simply doesn't care - doesn't even think about the people around them that could be dying, soon to meet the embrace of death. They simply don't care, ignoring them, carrying on with their lives without so much of a thought that death could strike at any second, could destroy their lives forever. It's amazing how people can go their whole lives without a care in the world, living as if death wasn't inevitable. People go their own lives, not a thought such as they or one of the people they loved could die today, oblivious to the horror and tragedy around them. People don't pay attention to that stuff - they just don't care, not even giving the thought of someone else's death so much of a second glance./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"That is, until it concerns them./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" align="center"-/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"It had happened so slowly, almost as if span class="mceItemHidden"the/span world had paused, coming to a stop for a minute or so, and then all at once - everything suddenly crashing and colliding together, showing mercy on no one as the universe pulled the strings and changed lives forever. The universe was cruel, in that way, not caring about anybody else's well-being, suddenly deeming whoever the universe wanted as worthy to be hand-plucked out of this world, as if the humans were toys and once they got too old or too boring they got thrown away, no warning to anybody./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"emNo,/em was the first thing that went through span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung's mind as/span/span he caught the sight of span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook's/span face on the news that was blaring from the television. His head rang in the worst way possible, processing the words such as emspan class="hiddenSpellError"Jeon/span span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span,/em emfound span class="hiddenSpellError"unconcious/span,/em and empronounced dead./em/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"emDead./em/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung's/span/span entire world wasn't spinning, wasn't doing that cliche bullshit everybody always says when something happens to them, something that they would have never expected. emOh, no./em Spinning wasn't even close to whatever grasp it had upon Taehyung right now, seemingly strangling him - he could barely breath. It was doing much more than that, anything possible; backflips, cartwheels, you name it - Taehyung felt as if he could faint, pass out that very second without even knowing it. The news had come to him slowly, and then all at once - kind of like a car crash if you'd think about it in that light. It's interesting in a sick, twisted sort of way. You're driving smoothly without a care in the world, everything is going great. You have somewhere to go, somewhere to meet. Maybe you just want to go home, meet the sweet warm embrace of your bed. No matter what it might be, you have plans. Plans to do something, go somewhere, meet someone, be someone. Suddenly, there's a car in the wrong damn lane, going towards you, speeding in your direction before you can even detect something wrong, something hurdling towards you at the speed of light. You see it as it's finally near, try to do something about it, trying to swerve away while the world was seeming as if it was in slow motion - but it's too late, far too late. You can't do anything about it anymore - you're gone./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"That's how span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span had felt./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span had known, just emknew/em that his life would be changed forever, that nothing would ever be the same without span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span by his side, comforting him, being there for him. He wouldn't be able to return to normal, wouldn't be able to showcasing his box-smile to no one in particular. Wouldn't be able to keep his head up, be hyper, embe himself./em Yet, he denied it. Taehyung had refused to believe anything he was hearing was real, getting angry every time someone on that goddamned news station had even so mentioned span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span or his supposed death./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"Seeing him on the television screen in front of him was just one example of that./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"em"No!"/em span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span had screamed with all of his might, his voice cracking as he held his head in his hands and he squatted down, tears streaming down his face. His brain was trying to come up with an excuse -em any excuse/em - that maybe he was hearing things wrong, maybe it was a different span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span. It couldn't be him, it was too soon, too early./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"But there wasn't any excuse or any other span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span. That was emhis/em span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span refused to accept that. He span class="hiddenGrammarError"was emoutraged/em/spanem./em/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""Fucking bastard!" He suddenly screamed, brutally knocking over a lamp which was now shattered span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSuggestion"onto/span/span the floor in pure anger, his face turning red as his eyes shook, his vision blurring as the tears streamed down his face in pain. span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span was infuriated, angry at everything and everything; he hated everything in the universe in this moment. He was a ticking time bomb, waiting, emitching/em to go off on anything and everything, waiting the blow up into anybody's face. He was mad at everything - the world span class="hiddenGrammarError"to be/span more precise - the universe. emHow could they do this? How the fuck could the universe take away a span class="hiddenGrammarError"life like/span that?/em It wasn't fair. emIt wasn't fucking fair./em/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""It's not fair. span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"It'snotfuckingfair/span/span," span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span shakily whispered to himself as the furious waterfall of tears had flown down his now reddened cheeks, his face looking swollen and used. He didn't want to believe it - didn't want to believe any of this was happening to him, that it couldn't - yet he was here, now sitting on the floor of his seemingly cold apartment, staring at the blaring TV with a blank face, his thoughts unknown even to himself. He'd stopped crying at one point, staring at span class="hiddenGrammarError"the television with/span a straight face, no expression at all as he heard some sort of male news anchor repeat over things monotonously. Yet, he wasn't watching it at the same time, not zoned out either. He couldn't feel anything, couldn't hear anything, couldn't even stumble across any thoughts, his mind blank. The earlier anger he once span class="hiddenGrammarError"had was/span gone, replaced with something that was entirely nothing at the same time./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung himself/span/span had never really thought about death. Never really thought about how it would feel like, what would happen, or what would happen if it had happened to anybody close to him. He never knew it was coming, never thought any of this could happen to him - not at this point in his life anyway. He was young - span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span was young. emYonger./em Yet the Universe, the cruel, evil, emheartless/em universe had pegged span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span worthy enough span class="hiddenGrammarError"to be/span taken out, thrown into the abyss away from this world and leave everyone that had ever talked to him with a broken heart, the monstrous universe this is./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"Yet, the universe didn't take just one person that dreadful day in October, didn't just leave hundreds of people with broken hearts that would never be mended together span class="mceItemHidden"to/span become restored. No, the universe took two people that one day./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span had physically died and took span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung's/span soul with him./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"emspan class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span was no longer living in this world./em/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" align="center"-/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span hadn't eaten for two weeks, emhe wasn't hungry/em he insisted, emhe didn't need anything to eat./em/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"And he wasn't lying, truthful span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"every time/span/span he told span class="hiddenSpellError"Jimin/span off when he'd tried to offer him some type of food to keep him from starving. span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span was never hungry anymore, not wanting to get out of bed for any reason whatsoever, slumping across the blankets and the mattress that span class="hiddenGrammarError"was supposed/span span class="hiddenGrammarError"to be/span comforting. Yet it wasn't, suddenly feeling too soft yet too hard at the same time. Even so, he was always in bed throughout day and night, at the same time his eyes are heavily marked with the darkness of sleep deprivation, kissed with the not-so-sweet crescent shaped dark circles under his eyes, span class="hiddenGrammarError"the tiring remembrance of/span the last conversation he'd had with span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span haunting him in every passing second, never letting him go to meet the sweet embrace of sleep, no matter how much he had tried. The way span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span had sounded, told him he was okay. That emfucking bastard/em - he'd emlied/em to span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span and now he was left alone in this world, cold and lonely. Though he sounded heartbroken, was no gaping hole in his heart, no shatters or anything - he no longer had a heart for it to be damaged further, he thought./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"Yet, his mind kept replaying the words span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span had said moments before his death as if it was a horrible broken record beyond repair, subjected to repeating itself forever until it was broken./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"em"Don't blame yourself"/em was what kept span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span up at night, keeping him from any sleep that was waiting him, never letting him have anymore than two hours of slumber. At the time of the phone call, he hadn't known what span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span meant, hadn't known if he was just being weird or not. emGod, what span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span would do to see span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span be weird in front of his own eyes once more, if only he was able to give a proper goodbye/em. He winced. span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span emknew./em span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span knew he was going to die, that he was going to abandon span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span in this world by himself even though it wasn't on purpose, wasn't his choice to do so. Maybe that's what infuriated span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span the most, drove him insane more than the other things. span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook had emknown/em /spanhis time was up, yet he hadn't tried to call for help in vain, hadn't even bothered to tell span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span that something was terribly wrong, that he would never be able to talk to him ever again, not in this life. Who was span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span span class="hiddenGrammarError"to be/span worthy of span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook's/span last conversation on earth, anyway? The last person who had heard him talk, breathe, emlive?/em span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span didn't deserve it, didn't deserve any of that, he thought. He pegged himself as worthless. He couldn't do anything to help Jungkook, to emsave/em him. Couldn't find out something was wrong with him soon enough to do anything about it. span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span had thought it was his fault, despite span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span having told him not to blame himself for anything that had happened. span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span couldn't do anything but beat himself up over that, refusing to eat or do anything productive with his life, migraines coming more often than not as span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span blamed himself for span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook's/span death, blamed himself for emeverything./em/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"Yet, deep down, span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span knew that even if he'd done and said everything he wish he had at the time, he wouldn't be able to save span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook's/span life. Wouldn't be able to pull him back into the world, no matter how much he'd wanted to./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"The universe took him away purposely./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" align="center"-/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"emIt was now November./em/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"It had been a month since span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span had the phone call with span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span. A month since span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span had left the world. A month since span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span had felt as if he lost his soul, all of his feelings, resulting in him feeling empty, chasing after anything and everything that could have given him some type of feeling, some type of meaning in this cruel world. After a few weeks of moping in bed, he'd decided to do something with his life, try to get over it, tried to forget. He tried. He couldn't put on his favorite jeans to go to a nightclub without sobbing, thinking about span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook in some sort of way, even while he was trying to forget about him/span. Though it'd been weeks, everything and anything reminded span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span of span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span. The bed in which they used to share, the air in which span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span used to breathe - emeverything/em./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span had tried, tried so hard to forget, emGod, he tried. /emHe threw himself headfirst into a stage of absolute denial. He had even tried to forget span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook /spanhad ever existed in this world, that he was never real all along, just a thought he had in passing, that he never knew anybody by that name, not really. span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span had tried so hard, trying to find anything to distract him: one-night stands to hookup with, getting addicted to things that were most definitely not good for his body, probably illegal too. Anythingspan class="hiddenSpellError" to/span distract his mind from the thoughts that had kept pounding, eating away his very brain with each passing second, not sparing him a single second to breathe./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span did find a few hookups, a few people who were rather more than excited to get on their knees and pleasure him in any way he felt like. He tried his very best span class="hiddenGrammarError"to be/span interested in them, in whatever they were doing the belt which rested upon his hips, yet he couldn't - couldn't be interested. Couldn't care less. He hadn't felt any sort of pleasure from any of it, rather not feeling anything at all. No matter in his attempts to forget, he could only think about span class="hiddenSpellError" span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span./em Whether span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span was getting sucked off by a stranger he'd only met once or fucked into a mattress by someone who's face he couldn't remember, span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung's/span eyes always stayed empty - emcold, dark, unoccupied, vacant - abandoned./em/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"After a while, span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span had stopped it all completely. Stopped the fake moans that erupted out of his mouth, stopped faking his pleasure. Stopped the hookups all together. None of it was enough, none of it was ever enough to make span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung /spanforget about span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span, how he used to make him feel. None of it even being able to distract him for a mere second, take his mind away from the thoughts that paraded his mind every day./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span was gone and span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span was all alone, no matter who was accompanying him./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" align="center"-/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"emIt was now December, a full two months after the dreadful events had happened./em/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span had gained strength, was finally strong enough to visit span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook's/span grave./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span had finally accepted that span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span was dead, yet he couldn't move on, couldn't forget about him no matter how much he tried not too long ago. Despite this, he had gotten better, started to eat again, started to smile span class="hiddenSpellError"occasionally/span, life slowly yet surely filling his eyes back up again, his soul steadily being span class="hiddenSpellError"restored/span with each passing day, finally span class="hiddenGrammarError"in acceptance with/span everything that had happened, his life almost seemingly coming back together hand in hand./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"Yet, he couldn't stop himself from bursting into tears the second he had seen span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook's/span/span grave, kneeling in front of it, the events of what had happened in the course of two months suddenly flushing back over him, a sudden reminder that everything wasn't okay. Nothing would emever/em be okay./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"emspan class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span had missed span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span so damn much./em/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""Hello," span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span said sadly, rubbing at his nose. To a stranger, he span class="hiddenSpellError"might've/span looked crazy, like some sort of psycho, probably looked like he was talking to himself. Yet it span class="hiddenGrammarError"was directed/span at span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span, in some type of feeling that could only be hope that span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span could still hear him, could sense his presence. Could see him./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""I hope you haven't span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"forgotten/span/span about me. I haven't forgotten about you. emAnd god, how I've tried./em" He let out a soft laugh that came out sounding more like a cough. "emI tried so hard."/em/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span had stayed silent for a few moments, staring at the headstone in front of him. Though it looked as if he was talking to a rock and nothing more, it seemed as if someone was there with him, as if he wasn't the only one there. It had given span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span some sort of hope, in a way. Like he wasn't the only one there, that maybe somebody else was listening to him./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""I emtried/em to forget you," span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span said, repeating himself as he spilled his feelings towards span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span, "but I couldn't. I missed you so much. I miss you so much./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""Sometimes I talk to myself, you know? I loved you emso/em much, I don't think anybody had even so much as questioned it. I've laid in my bed for the last two months thinking about everything we did together. When we first met each other in that much too cozy coffee shop that was so welcoming it was scary. How we had our first kiss under the stars, finding comfort in each other as if we were two puzzle pieces, itching to become glued together. How we both found home in span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"each other's/span/span arms, never wanting anything else but one another. How you were planning on proposing to me a few days after your death, planning on asking me span class="hiddenGrammarError"to be/span yours emforever./em I found out from span class="hiddenSpellError"Jimin a few days before, the gossipy one he is/span./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""You may have not gotten the chance to do it, but I just want to let you know now that I am yours forever. Screw all that 'till death do us part' crap; I'm yoursem forever./em Whether you're dead or I'm dead or emwe're both dead or alive/em. You took myem heart, span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span/span,/em and you emrefused/em to give it back to me. I gave my heart to you and you gladly accepted it. Now that you're...no longer in this world, I span class="hiddenSpellError"just-/span" span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span sniffled, tears streaming down his red cheeks at full force as he spilled out his feelings. "I fell into a spiral, span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span. I was out of control, I couldn't feel anything at all." emSniff./em "Why did you have to leave me in this world all by myself? Why didn't you just take me with you?"/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"It was a question span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span hadn't expected an answer to, yet he was oddly saddened when he didn't get one anyway, didn't get an span class="hiddenSpellError"explanation/span as to why he was the one who had gotten to stay in this world, wishing that it could have been himself that span class="hiddenGrammarError"was taken/span away from the universe instead. He wondered if span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span knew how badly span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span felt, driven enough to end his own life sometimes, to be with span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span, somehow, if it was even possible. How emcrazy/em he was, how eminsane/em he felt, a prisoner of his own mind. He'd felt so done with everything at times, wondering what was the point of venturing on. It made him disgusted with himself./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"He just sat, staring at the span class="mceItemHidden"lump/span of rock in front of him, span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung's/span breath increasing rapidly with each passing second as the tears seemed to flow down his cheeks. He didn't say anything for minutes, only thinking about everything that happened, thinking about everything that happened which lead up to this exact moment in which was span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span spilling out how he felt to the person who could only be span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""I miss you so much," he suddenly had croaked out, his voice seeming as if it was giving out./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""I talk to myself so much these days, forgetting that you're dead and I'm not, forgetting that we're no longer a part of the same universe. I keep asking myself trivial things like emwhat's for dinner/em and emspan class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"how /span/spanyou're feeling,/em waiting for a response from you. Yet, I never get one. It breaks my heart every time, you know? I just keep forgetting, despite how damn long it's been already. People stare at me so weirdly when I say something like em'what are you up to, span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span?'/em and I don't blame them. I just keep waiting for a reply from you and I just never get it and...emspan class="hiddenSpellError"IjustmissyousomuchJungkookohmygod/span./em" span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span was a sobbing mess at this point, collapsing even more than he was originally on the ground, seeming as if he was a type of putty, melting onto the cold misted grass./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""I miss you so much span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook,/span/span and I can't move on. It feels like nothing will ever be okay again, that the world will never become good ever again. That I'm just subjected to the same miserable life every day, that I span class="hiddenGrammarError"can't be/span normal. Sometimes I wonder to myself if I can do it. If can really live life. I don't know how to let go of you, how to move on. Please, tell me to let go. Please." span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span hadn't expected a reply, yet he didn't feel alone as he spilled out his feelings. He was alone, yet he didn't feel as if he was at the same time, if that had made any sense. Like someone was watching over him, listening to every word that had spilled out of his mouth. It was comforting in a way, despite the tears spilling down his cheeks in an unpretty matter, the snot dribbling down his nose as he sniffled every few seconds./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"Suddenly, he froze, not making a single movement, not even embreathing./em/span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"He must span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSuggestion"have been hearing/span/span things at that very moment./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden""Let me go, span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span," he'd heard from a voice identical to span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook's/span, quiet and strained as a whisper. span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span had tried to ignore it, tried to think it was just his mind playing yet another trick on him, coming back to eat his very soul he was trying so hard to build up once again only for it to come crashing back down at him all at once - but he couldn't. Not with the sudden warm presence that was now comforting him, embracing him. Suddenly, he knew. Taehyungem knew./em /span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Jungkook/span was there, listening to him, comforting him./span/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""Let me go, Taehyung," he repeated./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"span class="mceItemHidden"And so span class="mceItemHidden"span class="hiddenSpellError"Taehyung/span/span did./span/p 


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